Ugh.  I don’t understand litterbugs.  New York City makes it possible to dispose of your respective used items EVERYWHERE!  On every single corner, in front of apartment buildings, underground in subway stations, in every restaurant, cafe, and even in some bodegas.

So WHY?!?!?!? can’t you throw your godforsaken trash into a godforsaken trash receptacle?  I’m talking to you, kids in my neighborhood, who effortlessly drop individual Swedish Fish, Sour Patch Watermelon, and various gum wrappers on the street.  And I’m talking to you, guy the other week on the late-morning subway commute, who couldn’t BOTHER to take his coffee cup with him when his stop came along, abandoning it on the C train floor.  And I’m most recently talking to YOU, late night N train rider, who enjoyed your crinkle-cut fries with ketchup in a styrofoam container (aNOTHer environmental disaster), only to purposefully leave said container on the seat of the train after we traveled from Brooklyn to Manhattan.  Who cleans up after you?  Well, literally, the MTA employees who already love their jobs so much that they strike frequently.  Or various store owners and supers that have wrappers littering the street in front of their buildings.  Also, possibly waste management of NYC or the parks department when the trash blows into the ONLY sanctuaries our city possesses.  But who cleans up after you the rest of the time?  Your mommies?  Your husbands or wives?  I’m pretty sure you litterbugs aren’t the type who employ maid services, so who cleans up your messes?  I can only imagine what your respective apartments look like (swoon).  And what you’re teaching the future generations of this great nation.

So, what do we(the non-litterbug portion of society) do about it?  Notify an employee of various establishments when there are abandoned beverage cups alongside shelved items for sale? (Yes, I’m talking to you, veeeery sneaky lady putting your empty Starbucks cup on the T.J. Maxx shelf in-between picture frames).  Throw it away ourselves, shuddering at the germs?  The only thing I ever do is temper the anger that rises within me and at most, shoot a heart-broken, disappointed, longing look at the human contributing to the ruin of this Earth.

These menaces to society are everywhere.  At least most murderers ATTEMPT to clean up after themselves.  My wish is not for litterbugs to be more like murderers, but to take just one page from their book.  Don’t leave things behind.  Please.  For the sanity of all people possessing OCD.  For the people who genuinely respect this planet.  For everyone who respects other people’s time.  Don’t have the outright GALL to leave your shit everywhere.  I like to think that one day you’ll end up in a coffin with all of your litter.  Too dark?  Well, it helps me feel better.